Some Recent Photos

A photo of Hassan, Mira and me at Hassan's office.

A photo of Mira next to the Worldspace rocket that launched a satellite.

A photo of my sister's backyard in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

A photo of a dinosaur skeleton displayed at the Discovery Channel building in downtown Silver Spring, Maryland.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

The Family Get Together

Yes, the weather is going to change, but guess when?! When we leave on Friday, February 23rd. Of course it is. In fact, I predict right here and now that Cairo will have unusually cold weather followed by snow and sandstorms. OK, maybe not snow, but we will be returning to Cairo for sandstorm season. I don't care at this point, as long as it doesn't make my shoes wet and my jeans snowy.

I have said from the very beginning of living in Cairo, that I love the weather in Egypt. I don't miss the thunderstorms, tornadoes, hurricanes, and especially snow/ice storms in the US. I don't know who would miss them. But this year, and I have heard it from every member of my family here in the US that "strange you're here now, because we've had the coldest weather in at least 10 years." This runs from New Jersey to Western Pennsylvania, including of course Washington, DC.

Even today Mira and I were visiting with my sisters when it started snowing. Mira was really scared that I couldn't drive in the snow. When I proved to her that I can drive in the snow, she decided that I'm an excellent driver. Thanks, Mira for your overwhelming vote of confidence.

We went to my brother Tom's house yesterday for a family get together. Just about all were there, except for my one sister-in-law. We had a great time laughing and catching up on what everyone's doing. I think the personalities in my family are very strong, especially when it comes to laughing. As my Dad says "The nuts don't fall too far from the tree." Ah, how true, Dad. Our family motto.

Photos were taken, but I will not be able to post them until I return to Cairo. Only God knows when we will be able to gather together again like this; but I can tell you one thing: I am grateful for the time we are spending together.

I am at peace.

Alhamdulillah.

Ma'salaam,

Marian

"Jesus is Here"

Mira and I were riding back with Maggie's Mom from Western PA on Sunday when we drove by a church that read on a large marquis "Jesus is Here!" I couldn't believe it. I just started laughing. It is not out of disrespect or anything, but it seems as though having "Jesus is Here" in large red marquis letters flashing off and on is a bit much for me -- or anyone for that matter.

I know I am not used to seeing these types of signs in the US at all but especially in SW PA it seemed really out of place to me.

It seemed to me that Jesus was some kind of stand-up comic performing through the weekend.

For myself, to be reminded of God does not mean a large sign in flashing red marquis letters, or a church in the shape of a lighthouse just a few miles away from the red marquis church, but instead means hearing the beautiful adhan 5 times a day, at dawn, at noon, at mid-afternoon, at sunset, then at night. The beauty of Islam is not what I see with my eyes but what I feel in my own heart.

Perhaps seeing that sign along the highway reminded even more me how much I miss hearing the adhan and how much I miss Cairo.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Our week in Pennsylvania is winding down . . .

Today is our last day here in Pennsylvania visiting my sister and her family. It has been a wonderful visit. Mira doesn't want to talk about leaving early tomorrow morning. Maggie even had a bad dream last night telling Mira not to leave - don't go.

It breaks my heart to have Maggie and Mira separate - but it has been a wonderful bonding experience for both of them; something I know Mira will never forget and something I hope Maggie will remember, even though she's only 3.

I have thoroughly enjoyed spending time with Maggie's Mom (my youngest sister) and her husband, Jeff. He is one of the kindest and funniest people I've ever met in my life. My sister and brother-in-law have a beautiful home and of course family, meaning Maggie.

I had a chance to meet some of my sister's friends, and I feel comforted knowing that she has a solid network of women to rely upon and talk to when she feels frazzled. You know, someone to share your accomplishments with as well as someone to listen to when things aren't going so well.

We have shopped, eaten, and frozen our way through the past week. It has been absolutely bitterly cold, but enjoyable nonetheless. Mira loved the snow. At first she wanted to play in it, but later realized that it was just too cold and instead just walked around in the snow watching it sparkle in the sunlight.

I told Maggie that where we live we don't have snow, so Mira loves to look at it. It's always warm, sunny (Alhamdulillah), and sandy where we live. I wish I could tell you the way Maggie describes where we live, but just imagine a 3 year-old with her developing language pronounce "Egypt." It is adorable to listen to her talk.

We will leave early tomorrow morning, Sunday, for Washington, DC to see Hassan. There may be some relief on the horizon for Hassan in terms of work relief - but we will have to wait and see.

Tomorrow is also my birthday -- no mention of age here -- as I've stopped counting.

Alhamdullilah for everything.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

The Weather Report

I will never, ever complain about the cold weather in Cairo for the rest of my life. Wallahi (I swear)-- it is -20 C outside at the very least. Apparently the weather here in Western PA (Pittsburgh) is the coldest in 10 years. Of course it is, because Marian is in the US for the first time in two years! I long to feel the warm Egyptian winter sun kissing my face. (If you are like me, you would miss it too.)

We did some more shopping today. I know what you're thinking - why go out when it's icy, snowy and absolutely freezing outside?! Because my sister has snow tires and she lets nothing stop her from doing what she wants to do - just like Mom used to do. When there's a will there's a way. We were raised with the determination to do what we want when we want, regardless of what the weather is like outside.

We made our way through Target today -- a bit overwhelming - actually all the stores here are still overwhelming me and I need to stop and gather my senses before I just take one of everything in the store. I did manage to cross a few more items off my shopping list so I feel quite satisfied in that regard.

Mira got another pair of jeans - ok she's done with pants for now. I think she has enough to last her until at least the hot weather hits in Cairo. Me? Well, I managed to get some mints I've been dying for -- nothing spectacular but good old Lifesaver Peppermints. Plain old candy - it's hard to find a good mint in Cairo, along with some sugar free candies to give to family in Egypt.

I found some more moisturizer my face is in desperate need of - the Egyptian sun just sucks all the moisture out of my skin - especially my face. So now I'm into finding the "advanced age defying night cremes" to make my skin look younger. Ugh. Hair color - to color or not to color I'm still debating this one. If I color my hair, then I'm stuck doing it for the rest of my life. If I don't then I can do it whenever I wish. Luckily for me I didn't find anything I really liked unless I wanted to color my hair from reddish brown to bright red -- not.

I still haven't been able to find clothing prices better than Burlington Coat Factory in Silver Spring. The quality is great and the prices are knocked down. The sales lady said to come back after February 14th, when the prices will really be slashed. Gotta love winter clothes in the US; they're perfect for Egyptian winters too.

So I only have a few more stores to hit in the next 3 weeks: Kohl's (candles & maybe pants), Michaels/JoAnn's (crafts and quilting supplies), and Best Buy (video camera). Everything I am buying is very inexpensive, so my money goes further.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Week #1 in the US - A Summary

We arrived safely, Alhamdulillah. The next day or two were spent trying to recover from the flight. To help us recover, we went shopping! Of course the first thing I bought was a pair of jeans.

On the first Sunday, we visited my one brother, Tom and his family and had a nice visit. I saw my Dad and stepmom there for a short visit. It was a wonderful day spent with Tom and his family; catching up on the past two years is quite challenging.

Back to shopping. We are hitting the sales in the US at the perfect time of year. The winter clothes in the US are all on clearance right now so we're getting great quality clothes for a steal. Of course I don't feel guilty about it at all. While trying on clothes I found that I dropped at least 4 sizes, maybe more. This thrills me beyond belief because I have many more choices when it comes to clothes.

I'm just about finished with clothes, although I'll still keep my eyes out for great prices.

My list of things to take back to Cairo is getting smaller.

Mira got a lot of clothes so far and wants to spend too much money. I keep reminding her that these are US dollars we're spending and not Egyptian pounds. I think we're breaking Hassan's bank account.

Because of the changing situation in Hassan's office, it appears that he will be staying until June, at the very least. He has already proposed that we return for the summer if he stays longer. Hmm, I will have to wait and see. The Mediterranean is calling me for July . . . .

I haven't had a chance to get online too much. This is only my second chance in 5 days.

Beginning tomorrow, Mira and I are going to western PA to stay with Maggie's Mom for a week.

Thank you all for your well wishes and prayers for our safe trip.

I am still adjusting to the being here, away from the warm Egyptian winter sun. It is just too cold here to do anything.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Built Ford Tough

Hassan has a sweatshirt he bought here that says "Built Ford Tough." It's my favorite color - BLUE. He gave it to me and told me why he bought it.

Hassan lives in a really nice neighborhood in Silver Spring, Maryland - just outside of DC. Because he lives in a really nice area, there are many different types of people who live in the area - specifically gay men.

Hassan was telling me that the "men" in the building have been very friendly towards him - overly friendly to the point that it made him feel uncomfortable, especially the one receptionist.

So he went out and bought a nice steel blue sweatshirt with the "Built Ford Tough" on it. He wore it to let the "men" in the building know that he is straight. Only it is too small on him so it works against him.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Our trip was a success

We left Cairo on the 26th and checked in with EgyptAir. It seems as though Egypt is much more organized than New York.

The flight from Cairo to JFK was very long, but very smooth. Mira behaved very well, much better than expected. Mira watched many movies and I tried to sleep. I fell asleep listening to the Quran on the radio. One of the benefits of flying EgyptAir is that they play Quran on one of the radio channels. It was quite a comfort to me, because I was very nervous and anxious to fly.

I was really proud of Mira because she spoke Arabic with the stewardesses and Mira seemed to feel more comfortable on the flight than other flights before.

We arrived in NY and had to wait for an additional 3 hour delay because there was a back up on the runway. We slept the entire flight from NY to Washington, and didn't wake up until we were landing. What a relief. At least we were able to sleep a little bit.

The gibna romy and basterma made it through the flight for Hassan. Nothing was taken but a pair of scissors Mira accidentally packed in her carry-on after I told her no. Egyptian police caught it and I apologized "Asif, asif." He said "Mish Mishkilla." (Sorry, and no problem)

When we got home after checking out our luggage, we came back to the flat and Mira immediately fell asleep. I couldn't sleep and thought of my friends waking up going to the SAT at school. I will not change my phone clock because I miss my friends terribly already (you know who you are).

It is cold today, and we are on our way to do some shopping.

I will be looking for a video camera for my friend, and jeans for Mira and me.

I am still in hijab and will continue to wear it. I do not plan to take it off no matter what.

Alhamdulillah for my friends who helped us get ready for the trip. To Shabaan and Ehab for driving us to the airport and getting Hassan's medicine. And to Sameh, many thanks to you for taking the cat and for your friendship.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Parenting Experience

I just about had a breakdown the other day - OK, I did have a breakdown the other day. All vacation I asked Mira "Do you have any homework. Do you have math homework?" I cannot tell you how many times I asked her this question. Her answer was always evasive: "I don't think so. I don't have homework. I have Egyptian social studies." OK, so I trusted her without looking in her books. WRONG!!!

When I returned to school her teacher told me that Mira was in serious trouble with math because: 1) she hasn't been doing her homework and 2) she doesn't understand subtraction and borrowing from 3 and 4-digit numbers. I freaked out.

It was decided that if she didn't catch up with her homework and understand subtraction she would not go the US with me. She would stay with Aunt Olfat and I would go alone.

So Mira stayed after school several days with her teacher to have the math explained to her. She was miserable. She cried and threw a fit. You would think she was 3 years old all over again. As I always did, I ignored her. When Mira throws a fit, I ignore her. When she was 2 and threw a fit and was on the floor, I'd step over her saying "Let me know when you're finished." I have always dealt with fits very well, however, she couldn't really talk back. Now it's quite different. She came into the car and said "I'm not going to school tomorrow. I refuse to go to school tomorrow. Ms. Nora is not the boss of me." Well, at that point I let her have it.

We spent 6-7 hours on math homework the other night. We have been working on it quite diligently to make sure she understands the subtraction. Because I actually sat down with her and wrote out every problem, and she actually solved every problem, she understood it. She just didn't want to do it alone. I think she looks at the pages of homework and finds it quite overwhelming. I told her if she did her homework every night like she was supposed to she would not have the overwhelming feeling that she has now.

So I spoke with Mira's teacher yesterday and told her what we did. By the end of the day I asked her teacher how Mira did with math. Mira's teacher said she was actually impressed that Mira understood the math. She said I was the only parent that sits with my child to do their homework. I told her it's my responsibility as a parent to make sure my child understands her schoolwork, not just because I work at the school.

I don't know where she gets this behavior from. I was the perfect student - yeah, right. Now I see it from the other side. Ah, parenting. . . it keeps changing. If I have the cahunas to deal with this effectively, the next stage won't be as challening; or will it . . .

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Men and Women

OK, so Hassan's best friend, Shabaan, has helped us with absolutely everything we have in our home. This man is better than gold. I don't know what's better than gold, but he's it.

Last week he spoke with Hassan and said he would help me get my international driver's license so I can drive in the US. Yes, I have an Egyptian driver's license (can you believe I drive in this place?!) but I need a license to drive in the US too -- my Maryland license expired a year ago.

So yesterday, Shabaan called and said he was coming over to pick up my documents to take them to the place where he'll try to get me the license. I asked him if he needed me to come along, he said no, if he needs me, he'll call me. Everything in Egypt is done by connections, connections. Shabaan knows people in all places; and believe me that's a lot of people.

One day we were shopping for chandeliers in Attaba (a really crowded shopping area of Cairo). We just happened to pull into a parking space along the street - we were quite lucky, and all of a sudden Shabaan shakes the hand of someone he knew. It's a big city, but a small town. It's amazing.

Anyways, when Shabaan came to the apartment last night I gave him the documents and invited him in. He didn't want to come in and sit. It is customary in Egypt for men not to be in the homes of married women without their husbands. It goes against Islam, although it doesn't bother me and I don't think anything of it. I mean come on, I'm American, I'm used to mixing with men and women equally. Maybe this is why I have such a different outlook living here. It doesn't matter if I am in hijab or not. I have always felt more comfortable talking with men than a lot women -- no matter where I am in the world. Some of us are just "that way."

In Islam, the strict Muslims - well, what I consider strict, husbands do not allow their wives to go out of the home without a "mahram" meaning a male escort -- a male escort who is a family member. OK, if this were the case with me, I'd never go anywhere. I am not of that frame of mind, although I could see the need, being fair skinned and blue-eyed (ok, my brownish, red hair) and even in hijab I'm still gawked at by men, but I think it's more of a fascination and curiosity than anything else. (Layla can corroborate my story). I am finding out that this is why a lot of American women wear niquab (the full veil) over their entire bodies. However, once their voices are heard by Egyptian men, they start talking anyways. It is even more fascinating to them because they see the full veil but the American voice. Now, I'm not stereotyping here, please don't misunderstand me, but this has been my experience in most situations.

Insha'Allah Shabaan will be able to get my license without me needing to be with him. Otherwise it's an all day event running around; I don't mind, it's something I need to get done.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Dealing with Stress

In preparing to leave for the US, my stomach has been in nervous knots. I deal well under stress and great under pressure, however, with getting ready for the trip, I am finding that I am unable to complete one task at a time, much less multi-task.

I go to school and try to concentrate on what I need to get done before I leave, and then I get home and I try to figure out what I need to do next to get ready to travel. I am more challenged at home than at school. At home, I think about packing, and then realize that I'm not packing much, I'm not a clothes horse. Mira's been packed for one week now. I have some things to buy and I suppose I ought to start with that part of it. Maybe that will get me moving to pack other things to take.

Again, as I have said before, I never imagined to be traveling to the US to visit Hassan. I guess I'm still in a state of shock and this is how I'm dealing with it; by trying not to deal with it.

Even blogging has become difficult for me because my brain is shooting in a million different directions.

Throughout this whole process I have one thing to say: Alhamdulillah.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Tamer Hosny

I am just beginning to enjoy Arabic music, so I am listening to much more these days because Mira just loves it. So in listening the music channels over and over again while at home, I found a song by Tamer Hosny called "Ba3'yesh" (Baa'yeesh). It took me about a week to find out the name of this song because mostly everything on TV is written in Arabic so seeing the name of the song in Arabic does not do me any good.

I recorded the video through my mobile video camera and listened to the song many times; picking out the few words I understand.

Thanks to an MSN group of Tamer Hosny fans I downloaded the song. Although it's not the acoustic version currently on TV (it's a little jazzier) I enjoy it anyway.

Now if I can only figure out what he's singing about.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Missing in Action and Other Things

I have been missing in action (MIA) . I have been battling bronchitis, sinus, ears, you name it and I have it. I haven't been sick like this for three years, and it has to get me now. It's not exactly the way I wanted to spend my Eid vacation, but that's how it goes.

I have been watching a lot I mean a lot of TV. There is too much to think about and write about: for example, the execution of Saddam Hussein (of which I will have no comment), the election of Nancy Pelosi as the first woman speaker of the House of Representatives (a milestone for women not just in the US but all over the world), the swearing in of Congressman Keith Ellison as the first Muslim Congressman (another milestone), the comment made by Congressman Goode of Virginia about how Muslims need to stop coming into "our country" (speaking about Ellison, who by the way is a convert from Catholicism to Islam and was born in the US you idiot!). Ignorance isn't bliss, it's just stupid.

Preparing for the trip to the US, since I have been sick I am remembering all the cold medicines I want to get while in the US; for example, Theraflu, Sudafed Sinus, Tylenol Sinus, whatever sinus medicine I can get my hands on that will work safely (i.e. not raise my blood pressure). I have also been thinking about how I'm going to bring some of my things back to Cairo - taking empty suitcases and bringing back full suitcases.

I've been chatting with Maggie's Mom (MM) online and having a wonderful time doing it. We are laughing, almost crying, and looking forward to seeing each other when Mira and I arrive at the end of January. It is also fun to see her daughter, Maggie, ask questions about Mira and me. I can't wait to see her because it's been almost two years since we left the US. I told her I want flannel sheets for Cairo, which we cannot find here - they export the fabric but don't sell the sheets here - go figure. She asked me what color, I said I don't care as long as there isn't any pattern on it - I'm so patterned out from the sheets my mom used to have in the 70's, stripes, big flowers, etc. Also, I'm patterened out from living in Egypt. So MM went to Kohl's and found
solid color sheets - she said guess what color? I said what, she said "camel". No joke. I love the color.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Conversations with Egyptians

Mira and I went to a birthday party for one of Mira's friends on Thursday. I was hesitant to go because for whatever reason I think I don't get along very well with Egyptian women, but I went anyway. (It is my own insecurities coming out.) Mira's friend's mother, Ola, is just as delightful as can be, and of course she is Egyptian, and she sews, which is something we have in common. She is very welcoming.

One of her cousins, Nahla, was there. I looked at her and thought "Oh my goodness, what am I going to talk about with this woman." Actually, we really hit it off. She is Lebanese/Egyptian, her husband is Lebanese, they have a place in Rehab being built, and they are currently living in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia. She made me feel so comfortable, told me about life in Riyadh and how women gather everyday - every morning to have coffee, talk about their lives, problems, successes, etc. She explained that women in Saudia cannot drive - something everyone knows about, so the best thing they do is shop. Whenever they go out, they must be in full niquab, which she doesn't like because she cannot see through the veil, and stumbles everytime.

We were talking about music and the newest Arabic songs. Since I cannot understand many of the songs, I usually like a song by its melody. They asked me my husband's name, and I said "Hassan." They said, "Well, there are a lot of love songs out right now about Hassan. You ought to learn them and have a little romance." I blushed.

Arabic/Muslim women are very conservative on the outside, but get them in a room or a party with only women and all the stereotypes disappear. It was very refreshing and I felt relieved.

I keep explaining to Egyptians that Americans talk about anything and everything, we are not shy when it comes to conversation. There are no "taboos" in American society. Well, if there are any I'm not aware of it.

On another note, Debbie and I went shopping recently and when we were shopping a man asked me where I was from. I said America, and then I told him that my husband is Egyptian. He turned to his friend smiling and said "She's looking for an Egyptian husband." His friend said "No, she said her husband is Egyptian." They both looked at me and smiled. Of course I didn't know what they said (Debbie translated). Debbie said everytime we go out an Egyptian man talks to me, as though he's interested in me. She told me I need to wear niquab or at least an abaya (a long coat). I cannot dress anymore frumpy when I go shopping, believe me.

A few days later I was with a dear friend of mine, and they told me that I don't need to worry; because I am in hijab it is my protection. No one will ever say anything disrespectful to me. I forget I am even wearing hijab; I don't even feel it anymore - it has finally become a part of who I am - a part of my personality. Alhamdulillah.

I am finally comfortable living here - every opportunity and experience brings me to a new level of contentment.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

We are headed to the US for vacation

Wow, what a surprise, huh? It's definitely a surprise for us too. Mira and I are going to the US January 26 flying Egyptair. I never flew Egyptair before so it will be one long flight to New York (JFK) - 10 or 12 hours from Cairo. From JFK we will fly into Dulles. We tried to get a flight to Pittsburgh to visit one of my sisters, but the layover in JFK would be 5 hours. Too long to ask Mira to sit in the US without moving. Our flight leaves Cairo 10 am on January 26 and we will return February 24th. We will miss two weeks of school because we have a mid-winter break in there until February 11th. I don't know who will take us to the airport. I am nervous to fly in the winter, especially January and February. Ok, I'll admit it - I'm afraid to fly in January and February. I think of the icing on the plane and I lose it from there. I watched too many shows on National Geographic. Chalk it up to my wild imagination.

When Hassan left for the US I never expected to visit him in the time he was gone, but it seems as good a time as any to go. He said we can go now or go in June - hmm. I had to think about this and decided to go now because I honestly don't know how long he'll be gone at this point (yes things may change and he may be staying longer, much longer than originally planned) and I want us to spend the summer in Alexandria. I am finding more and more people who spend their summers in Alexandria and it would be great to see them there instead of missing them from Cairo.

While in the US I have a long shopping list of things to buy and bring back to Cairo. Mostly basics such as Theraflu, Tylenol (Panadol is used here in Egypt), Benadryl, thick winter leotards, etc. I want a polarfleece top because mine are way too big and I don't know what size I am right now in the US. Mira has her long list of toys. Obviously, we will not be able to buy everything on her list, but it will be a good chance to pick up some movies she has wanted for awhile. She's really into musicals right now. The first thing Mira needs is a nice winter jacket. We lost two of her jackets last year - we think they were stolen at school.

Yesterday we went to CityStars and had lunch with a friend of mine. I am going to embroider two bathrobes for her to give as gifts. I am really excited because it is "our" first customer. Yes, there is hope for a larger business in terms of embroidery but this will take time of course (meaning, money). Insha'Allah it will work out.

Egypt is a great place to start an embroidery business because everything here is embroidered. Also, I still want to start a quilting business but need to find out where to get the fabric and actually get there to buy the fabric. I bought flannel for quilting thanks to a dear friend of mine, and now I want to move on to get other things - quilting cottons. I see them on TV as there is a quilting show on Nile TV here but it's all in Arabic. It is nice to see, though because the woman uses quality cottons. Her technique is a little outdated, but it works. (I know the shortcuts she doesn't use.)

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

There's something going on around here . . .

Hassan has been away three weeks and already wants us to be with him. He suggested that Mira and I travel to the US for our mid-winter break (end of Jan-beginning of Feb). While I want to go to the US and see Hassan and my family, I am afraid to fly in the winter for obvious reasons. So, he is looking into airline tickets to the US around January 25 to February 23. We will see how it goes. Insha'Allah it will all work out.

We got a cat. Yes, you know we love them to death - literally. Poor little Persian or Shirazi as they call them here in Egypt. She likes to talk a lot for a Persian, almost like a Siamese. She's great - especially with Olivia, excuse me, I mean Mira handling her all the time.

Debbie had a "Christmas" party this evening at her place. There was no religious tone to the party, just a get together of women and their children. It was really nice. Since it is her first
"Christmas" with her two children outside of America, she thought it would be a good idea to transition them out of the holiday season. It was a good evening - no men were there so women could take off their hijab. I, of course left it on because I'm always cold.

I managed to figure out how to hook up my digital camera as a webcam and used it with Maggie's Mom the other night. If I can hook up a digital camera as a webcam, anyone can. Maggie's Mom had me laughing hysterically.

Three photos: our new kitten-cat, Mira and Jasmine dancing a ballerina dance they created themselves, and Mira and me.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

School vacation is coming

Here in Egypt our Eid vacation starts on Friday, December 22 for two weeks. Alhamdulillah. We will return to school on January 8th, and then be at school for three weeks - two weeks of review (or 'revision' as Egyptians call it) and one week of exams. After the exam week we will have our winter vacation break for two weeks, I believe. This ought to take us into the first week in February. At least this is how I understand it as of today.

Mira has been fighting some type of virus so I was out of school Sunday and Monday. I returned today and found my desk exactly as I left it - a complete mess. If you were to see my home it is spotless. But work is a different story. Too much work and not enough time -- oh yes, and only one of me.

While I was home taking care of Mira I was re-thinking my resignation from school. I thought how wonderful it would be to be home all day, not to worry about what to wear (although I like dressing nicely - it makes me feel good), what to complete at school, etc. I also thought about quilting, sewing, and even crocheting at this point. But then I thought about my lack of contact with adults. I can count a few friends I can trust completely, I mean completely at school, and I would miss them dearly. So I returned today ready to pick up where I left off a few days ago, trudging ahead with my hip boots strapped high, trying to avoid all the "road apples" that fall in my path.

I have been able to avoid my problem from last year. He comes around in the morning, and while I see him in the hallways, I always try to avoid him by looking in another direction or by ducking in a safe classroom. I've even been able to learn how to hide from him.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Out here on my own

We went to Olfat's after school on Thursday. She was very happy to see us and started crying. She asked about Hassan and I said he was fine. Everytime she talked about him she started crying so I would not mention his name too much.

She had her bone scan on Thursday but the results haven't been made known yet since the report hasn't been written. I hope for the best, but expect a decline. It's just the realist in me from past experience.

For dinner at Olfat's we had basilla (yes, peas) and gazar (carrots) with lahme (meat) and rice. Mira had spinach and beef. She loves it. Going there without Hassan reminded me of how I never appreciated my Mom's food until I moved out of the house, got married, and was repsonsible for my own meals. Everytime I went back "home" no matter what Mom made it tasted great. I felt the same way at Aunt Olfat's.

Hassan's cousin Walid and his wife and daughters went to Olfat's and Mira played with the kids for awhile. We stayed for about three hours and eventually made our way home after stopping at the souk (market) for a few things.

Yesterday I made fuul and adddddddttttttttttts (lentil soup). Yummm. I cannot have enough whole grains in Egypt. I know it's not meat, but who cares. I never really cared for red meat anyways, unless it's a nice thick juicy steak from Nick's.

I went to the souk last night again with Mira and Jasmine and met one of Debbie's friends who recognized Jasmine. She is a full niquab and asked me 'Are you Muslim?' WHAT?! Does it matter? I thought I could have done a "Joe" on her, but instead for Debbie's sake I was polite. Sometimes it is better not to say anything at all -- just smile.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Catching up . . . .

I called Hassan today. He called me last night and I was sleeping. I sleep so hard at night I don't even hear the phone ring with it right next to my bed.

Hassan seems to be getting settled -- he's moving to his new apartment today and will be right across the street from his office. I worry about his safety - it takes on an entirely different meaning in the US than it does here in Egypt. I never worry about him here in Cairo - just in the US. I also worry about his health for reasons I don't want to explain right now.

When Mira talked to Hassan she spent half the time crying saying she misses him. I know how she feels. She told me that I don't miss him because I don't cry. Well, I don't cry, but I miss him. I told her if I cried and she cried then we would never stop. Kind of like Lainie and I crying and then ending up laughing.

I have one more week of school and then we're off for a week or two - I can't remember right now. It's the Hajj so we have vacation - only now they're beginning to call it "Christmas" vacation. OK, I'll go with it.

The owner of the school is still in the office and will probably be there for another week. It is good to have her there for many reasons, only it is very stressful in a passive kind of sense. I will be glad when the weekend comes.

We are going to Aunt Olfat's tomorrow after school to see how she's feeling. She had a bone scan today so I want to know the results. Also, I am concerned about her taking her medicine on a regular basis because no one will help her remember. If only I could help her . . . memories come rushing back too quickly to re-live Mom's last year - especially this time of year.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Sobhan'Allah - The Pope's Recent Trip to Turkey

I was thrilled to see the Pope pray inside the mosque in Turkey. When the Pope took off his shoes and stepped inside the mosque to pray, I was so satisifed that he went so far beyond what was expected in order to mend the divide between Muslims and Christians. I found this article on Yahoo this morning and found another positive outcome to the Pope's recent visit to Turkey. Something in Arabic can only be explained by saying "Sobhan'Allah" (something that cannot be explained, except by God).

Ma'salaam,

~Marian


ISTANBUL, Turkey -
Pope Benedict XVI' name=c1> SEARCHNews News Photos Images Web' name=c3> Pope Benedict XVI's successful visit to Turkey was the answer to Turkish tourism operators' prayers. In the tension-filled days before the pontiff's arrival, tour operators confessed Friday, they prayed he wouldn't say anything that could be taken as an offense to Islam, that he wouldn't pray at the Haghia Sophia and that the anti-
Vatican' name=c1> SEARCHNews News Photos Images Web' name=c3> Vatican demonstrations wouldn't be too large or violent.
Most of all, they wished for him to return home safely. "It was a blessing for Turkish tourism that it went so well," said Nurdan Ustman of United Travel Services, a 45-year tourism veteran. "I'm sure in the coming year we will see positive repercussions in the image of the country, and image is everything in tourism."
The trip was a success in part because there was so much that could have gone wrong, said Mert Dagoglu of Istanbul-based International Travel Services. "It was such a successful visit because we were all so afraid of the negative effects," he said by cell phone from a cruise ship near the resort town of Kusadasi. "In Turkey, a Muslim country, the demonstrations could have affected the whole atmosphere. But fortunately nothing but positive things happened, and we're so happy."

Ahhh, the weekend . . .

Last night Debbie and I took the kids to Carrefour to do some grocery shopping. Debbie wanted to get an mp3 player for her son Karim. We couldn't find an mp3 player for less than 400 LE - we got one for Mira for 285 but it was a holiday special - we found out last night. So Debbie didn't buy one and the kids were really upset.

I found coffee - Carrefour French coffee - 12LE a block - so I got two. Excellent coffee - better than American coffee (oops, did I say French coffee is better than American coffee) and much cheaper than the 40 LE Maxwell House. I got Peter Pan peanut butter for 14 LE a jar - I got two. Usually it costs 34 LE a normal size jar.

I didn't buy anything I didn't need - although I looked for clothes but didn't find anything I liked.

This morning we went to the club here in Rehab - Jasmine had piano lessons and Debbie and I sat and talked with a Moroccan woman who is married to an Egyptian - very nice woman. I have always been fascinated with Moroccans probably because their Arabic is mixed with French (twisted into their own language). Mira played on the trampoline.

After the Friday prayer we went to the mall to look for an mp3 player for Karim - none there. The hijab store I like was closed, so we came home.

Mira played with Jasmine all day and I slept off and on. I wasn't feeling very well. Debbie came over and had some coffee then took the kids back to her place for the evening. I was able to take some medicine and rest, and sweat out whatever it was bothering me. I don't know, but Alhamdulillah I feel better right now.

Jasmine's spending the night and the girls are set up in the TV room watching Harry Potter.

Tomorrow's Saturday and I don't know what we'll be doing. I want to buy a crochet hook and some yarn so a teacher at school can show me how to crochet. I think it's time to go to Kolle Shay (the closest thing to a craft store for me).

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Little by Little - Shwayya Shwayya

I spoke with Aunt Olfat yesterday and it seems as though she is very sick. She went to the hospital for blood analysis and glucose testing. She said that she was very sick this week and I think her glucose levels are really worrying her. It was long overdue, but I'm glad she went to get her blood tested. She had been so focused on her chemo that she neglected the glucose levels. Insha'Allah she will be feeling better soon. I think from this point on the goal is to make her as stable as possible and as comfortable as possible.

I went shopping with Debbie on Tuesday. I bought some boots, wore them yesterday, forgetting to break them in and my feet were screaming "Ouch! Let me out!" all day. But I looked good! I need to break them in at home before wearing them out again. They were really reasonable 100LE for real leather. The leather here in Egypt is incredible and the prices are great. I also bought two plain sweaters - no sequins, no lace, no designs. Debbie said it was too "plain Jane" but I like that considering it is next to impossible to find a hijab without sequins or any type of design on it.

Students in G10-12 didn't have school yesterday to prepare for exams today. It was a nice day without the high school students. I will be proctoring an exam today -- fine with me. I like being in a classroom for exams.

Mira has her play today. She's the narrator and has 12 lines. She has anxiety attacks over anything really big at school. So the teacher said she can write the lines on index cards. Good, problem solved there.

I made spaghetti and kobeba (Syrian style meatballs) for dinner last night. The spaghetti was really good but the kobeba is always too salty. I fell asleep shortly after that and slept until 5 this morning. Alhamdulillah I slept well. Mira has been sleeping better too. I can't figure it out. Maybe because I'm trying to keep her occupied.

I got a message from Hassan that was sent on Dec 3 but received at 2 a.m. this morning. He is not happy in the US - I think it's because of the all the game playing and back-biting people do. At least we know that nothing has changed at his company, but what a way to find out.

It has rained - I mean poured here in the desert for the past two evenings and nights in a row. It hasn't rained like this since we moved here. Maybe this is an omen -- God is telling us something.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Life keeps moving forward

I went to school yesterday and tried my best to avoid the person I was working with last year. He still has my mobile number (no big surprise there) but of course I deleted his. He asked me why and I told him that I needed to clean out my phone listings and since we were not working together anymore there was no need for me to keep it. He said "Marian but you're my sister." Sister. Right. No way. When a man in Egypt says to a woman "you're my sister" it means I like you in a friendship sort of way. But in his case it's not that way and I know it. He stays away from me if I am in my office so that's where I stay most of the time.

Mira needed art supplies for art class today so last night we went out to 4 or 5 different stores in Rehab to look for bottled white of white glue for paper mache. We didn't find it but found other glues she needed for art. I told her not to expect 3 months of this - I will get her what she needs but not what she wants.

I heard from Hassan this morning via email and it seems as though he is trying to pick up where he left off at work. He is also trying to find a place to stay for 3 months, however, the prices run approximately $2,000/month. Ouch! He is however on a waiting list for a lower priced apartment.

I told him that I'm learning how to use his mobile phone that he left in Egypt - it's a Motorola Razor. I love it, but it's a flip phone and I don't care for that part of it. It is great. Messaging is easy - using bluetooth is easy - everything about it is easy - except for the French owner's manual. No English. Oh well, I'm relying on Mira's teacher to show me because she has the same phone.

I am off today; took my day off, and Mira is at school. Debbie and I are going to run around Cairo today and try to get some things done. It should be fun and traffic shouldn't be too bad. At least it won't be completely and totally jammed like it is every night of the week. When do Egyptians sleep? It will take me forever to figure out the answer to this question.

I still haven't found any American coffee - it's been at least a week - for now it's instant Nescafe for me. I hope to find some today - Folgers, Maxwell House, aya hagga (anything) with an American label on it. Even the cheap Egyptian made "American" coffee will do at this point. Either the stores aren't stocking enough for demand or they aren't carrying the coffees anymore. I hope it's the first one. I know that instant coffee is lower in caffeine so I don't have the same type of buzz I'm used to having so early in the morning. Oh well. . .

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

What in blazes is going on?!

First the good news -- Hassan called me at 6:30 a.m. this morning (Cairo time) to tell me he got a mobile phone (ok cell phone) and he is in Maryland/DC. He starts work tonight with Stoney and will stay with Stoney for the first couple of days. Alhamdulillah.

Now for the rest of the story:

I don't know what is going on - maybe it's the alignment of the stars or something, but it has been absolutely hectic here and crazy for the past couple of weeks.

My friend, the princpal of the school where I work, was out grocery shopping one night and had her purse stolen at the grocery store. It had everything in it -- keys to her home, office, flash memory, money, credit cards, kolla hagga (everything) in it.

There are problems at school amongst students of the various grades and racial/ethnic backgrounds. (I really don't want to elaborate on this right now.)

Then Hassan left. A whirlwind all on its own.

Today I went to school, found out that someone who I thought was gone from the school has returned, and I have done my best to keep away from him. The principal was not in a good mood today and interrupted a friend's class, making him feel uncomfortable. I told him that she was distributing her frustrations equally today and not to take it personally.

Now, after the day is over, with Mira sleeping since 6:30 p.m., I get a call from Debbie. She took Karim and Jasmine down to Dokki Street (downtown Cairo) from Rehab, to get Jasmine's braces adjusted. While Debbie was en route to her home, her purse got stolen. The thief only got a 150 LE, but her passport, keys, credits, yes, once again, kolla hagga (everything) was in there. She called me from the police station and I tried to get her landlord on the phone to tell him to bring the extra key to Debbie's apartment, but the person that I spoke with didn't understand any English and my Arabic is really bad.

The great part about today is it's almost over. The not-so-great part is I get to do it all over again tomorrow.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

So Far So Good

I got an email from Hassan today saying he was in Newark, NJ overnight because of bad weather. Better safe than sorry - really sorry. The airline put him up in a hotel and he even enjoyed a good ol' US steak - a real steak - I think I remember it. He is supposed to fly from Newark to Washington, DC sometime today and begin working Sunday night EST - Monday morning Cairo time.

Mira and I were up early this morning. We were at school at 7 a.m. for the SAT exam (earlier than a regular work day of 7:30). It was the first time our school administered the SAT and I was called in as a back-up. Not knowing I would be utilized, I didn't really study the manual. However, as the walk-ins approached, I had a classroom of 15 students - half of them are some of the most mischievious bunch of students in our school. They are not bad students, just antsy - more antsy than your average 16 or 17 year-old.

The test started about 8:15 and was over at 2:30. I had to keep track of every minute, take mobile phones, account for every exam and answer sheet. I noticed that the majority of students faired better on the math than the English. I cannot imagine taking the SAT in a second language. It is difficult enough.

The goal today was to make our school a difficult testing site -- one I hope to have achieved. Some of the students said I was too tough - good according to the Deputy Principal.

We got home about 3:30 and the afternoon flew from then on.

I spoke with my friend Debbie on the phone and we talked about Islam. She recently converted to Islam from being a Christian and is doing her best to follow the prayers. I told her that if there is anything I can do to help to let me know. I gave her some materials which she said she appreciated -- translated suras from Arabic to English transliteration.

I plan on taking Tuesday off this week as my regular day off. I am hope to get to having Sundays off, but I was off Thursday so I thought to go in tomorrow. Debbie works on Mondays, so I will take Tuesday off so we can spend the day together. I don't know what we'll do or where we'll go, but it ought to be fun.

I'm trying to keep busy with Hassan gone and I don't see any problem with that right now.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

"I will kiss your tears away" - Dire Straits

I knew last night was not going to be easy. I knew that it would be emotional for all of us, especially Mira. Whenever she cries I think of the Dire Straits song "I Will Kiss Your Tears Away."

Hassan left last night and is on his way to Washington, DC. I can't believe it. He can't believe it. Most of all, Mira can't believe it.

Shabaan, Gamal and Ehab came over last night about 10:00 to drive Hassan to the airport. They sat for a little bit, had tea, and then it was time to go. Luckily Mira was sleeping since 8 so it was a little easier for Hassan to spend time with his friends.

When it was time to go, Hassan and I went to wake up Mira. I could see that Hassan was really sad. He doesn't cry, at least I've never seen him cry, but he got really close when we went to wake up Mira. She cried and cried. "Oh my little girl loves her Daddy" I thought. All the love in the world is wrapped up in this 8 year-old who doesn't want to let him go.

Hassan was getting ready to leave and Mira was on the back balcony waiting to see Hassan when Hassan and I said our good-bye. After all this, all this big talk, this great idea about him going for a couple of months came down to these last few minutes.

No it's not a long time, it's only a couple of months, but honestly we've never been apart for more than 3 weeks at a time and that was when Hassan would visit Cairo (I know I'm repeating myself). We've never been apart especially with Mira. Alhamdulillah Hassan and I have a great marriage. We don't argue much, we agree on most things, agree to disagree on others, live independent lives but always come home to each other. One does not overpower the other, nor does one manipulate the other. We are an equal balance, a partnership. Most of all we trust each other to the end.

Mira and I were on the back balcony when Hassan left with his friends. She cried and cried, and all I could think of was the Dire Straits song. It was sad but beautiful that this little girl who is trying to be so grown up so early in life loves her Daddy so much. "Daddy, don't go!" she cried, "Daddy, why are you leaving me!" She eventually settled down and fell asleep.

I don't know when she gets all the "drama queen" theatrics from - oh, I forgot - I'm her mother - maybe she gets it from me (smile).

Ma'salaam,

Marian

The clock is ticking and I want it to stop

I am really nervous about Hassan leaving for the US. I told him that I cannot imagine living here without him - for obvious reasons, but mostly because I love him and will miss him terribly. He and I have never been apart for this amount of time - maybe 2-3 weeks when he would travel to Cairo on vacation, but not longer. And definitely not apart when it comes to parenting. We believe in the tag-team approach to parenting. I don't know how Mira will take this. She is not saying much right now, but come tomorrow and Thursday she will be devastated that he is leaving.

All I care about is Hassan's safety. I have to worry about him again in the States where crime is much higher than it is here. In Egypt, everyone is safe anytime of the day or night - together in groups or alone - woman or man. There is absolutely no tolerance for crime in this country. I don't know if that's good or bad. An American teacher in my school last year was carjacked on her way to school. She went to the police station and they immediately pummeled the man who carjacked her. Interesting. I'm not saying it's right, but it's sort of a relief that there is a zero tolerance policy.

Sure Hassan will be able to shop in the US for a few things I want - Bath and Body Works moisturizer, Yankee candles, whatever it is that Mira wants - within reason of course, some embroidery machine supplies, and the old standard of "3 buck Chuck." Hassan said that he will drive to Waldorf at some point and get some really good steaks.

I need to look on the bright side of this and make the best of it - it's only for 3 or 4 months and when he returns it will almost be spring here - sandstorm season but who cares as long as my habibi (sweetheart) is back safely in Cairo.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

And the countdown begins . . .

Hassan will leave at 4:00 a.m. on Friday morning, December 1. Fortunately I will not have to work so I can take him to the airport which is only 15 minutes away from my home. I will sleep the rest of Friday - as much as I can because I usually don't do well until he lands wherever he is headed.

I need to check out the TSA website for "allowed" and "not allowed" travel items as well as the whole carry-on baggage issue which has drastically changed since we traveled a year and a half ago.

Mira is very upset Hassan is leaving. She cries a lot and says "Daddy's not coming back." I try to comfort her as much as possible. Then I tell her that he's leaving to bring her back a lot of things that she wants (kind of, because everything is available here in Egypt). Mira's list includes PlayStation 3 (no way!) and Skecher tennis shoes (why? I don't know but I don't think she's getting them).

I've been having a lot of deja vous lately - I think I'm a little overwhelmed with everything going on here. Some people say that deja vous are a kind of hiccup in the brain, but I don't know for sure.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

A Meme

I am really stressed out right now -- between Hassan getting ready to leave and many events taking place at school I am an emtional mess. So I found this list on Layla's blog and thought it would be fun to do for a change.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian


20 years ago, I:

1- was 23 years old.
2- had a two brothers who were 25 & 26 years old and two sisters who were 19 & 17 at the time. (ok so I'm the middle child)
3- wanted to fun and was very selfish and judgmental.

10 years ago, I:

1- was 33, married to my habibi and in my dream job not knowing life was about to change forever.
2- watched my mother quickly decline after a battle with cancer and spent just about all my free time with her.
3- bought our first house.

5 years ago, I:

1- was 38, married and in our dream house with unfortunately the nightmare yardwork that came along with it.
2- thought I was happy where I was but felt there was still something missing -- something more.
3- knew that life for us would never be the same after 9/11.

3 years ago, I:

1- was 41 and working part-time in a job I really didn't like very much.
2- realized that materialism isn't everything.
3- knew life would change and we would be moving on, which was not easy for me to come to grips with.

1 year ago, I:

1- was getting to move to our new flat.
2- was 42 and saw Mira change from a little girl into a young lady who is into rainbows, mermaids and unicorns.
3- was beginning to realize that I have to make the best of my life here in Cairo.

So far this year, I:

1- bought a really great sewing machine.
2- started wearing hijab.
3- lost an additional 10 kilos to bring the total to 30 kilos (approx. 60 pounds).

Yesterday I:

1- woke up at 5:00 a.m. getting ready for the school day.
2- told Hassan that I love him.
3- tickled Mira.

Today I:

1- got up at 3:30 a.m. (slept too early last night)
2- made a pot of coffee which I will consume before I leave for school at 7 a.m.
3- sat outside on my balcony and listed to the Adhan for Fajr prayer in the dark looking at the stars (my favorite time of day).

Tomorrow, I will:

1- go out with friends.
2- update Hassan's lists before he leaves.
3- remember to be grateful for everything I have been given.

In the next year, I will Insha'Allah:

1- continue to lose weight.
2- have three quilts finished.
3- see my family in the U.S.

Hassan's Travel Plans

So it is confirmed -- Hassan needs to be in Washington, DC by December 3 - that's the day he will start work. The contract is for three months. He wll return sometime in early March -- ahh, the sandstorm season in Cairo.

He is searching for a flight to DC without having to travel through JFK. He's not worried about packing -- just my shopping list (thank you Habibi!).

I cannot believe he will be leaving for three months. This is a surreal experience for me because we have never been apart from each other for more than a few weeks at a time. After almost 14 years of marriage, another first. How many more "firsts" am I going to experience in my lifetime? I do not know. I am always up for an adventure and a good time -- ask anyone who knows me, but the worry over him flying always stresses me to a breaking point.

Depending on his flight time, I may or may not be taking him to the airport here in Cairo. Actually we live 15 minutes from the airport, so it is not a big deal to drive him, but it is very emotional for Mira. It might be better for all of us if Shabaan drops him off.

Get out the winter coat, gloves and hat. It's going to be a cold transition from Cairo to DC.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Al Jazeera in English

After much anticipation, Al Jazeera has begun broadcasting their English speaking channel. It is very interesting. It seems as though they have a lot of British reporters on staff. I have not seen many American reporters yet, but I am sure they are out there somewhere. I have only been able to catch the hourly news so far. Al Jazeera is well known for its documentaries.

The channel has already interviewed American troops in Iraq, covered up to the minute bombings of Palestine, in addition to the awful situation in Sudan, explaining how one refugee camp is split in two: one side for the peace agreement, one side against. The weather report even covers Cairo. The Arabic Al Jazeera channel never covers Cairo -- apparently they do this on purpose (maybe they like Egyptians or maybe the sun always shines).

I do not know if it will be available in the US, but here in Egypt it is broadcast on Nilesat. Of course, it's free to air. No subscription is needed. Check their website www.aljazeera.net/english.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Change is in the air -- In more ways than one

On Election night, November 7, my youngest sister in the US sent me the following message on my mobile: “I just voted and change is in the air.” I thought this would be the perfect title to a blog entry concerning the elections.

Thursday morning, Hassan phoned me at school and said that he heard from his boss in the US and they want him for a contracted period of 90 days, beginning as soon as possible. Now that's "change in the air."

When we moved here a year and a half ago I was told by women in my email groups that I needed to wait a year or two -- you will see your husband go back to the US and you will want to stay in Egypt. I thought no way -- Hassan is so happy here he would never go back to the US for a good job. I will be the first to leave and take Mira with me and he can stay here in Cairo. I got close to leaving a couple of time but never followed through on any urges. In all honesty, the move from the US to Cairo just about drained every emotion out of my heart.

Well, those words are ringing true and I cannot stop and think about how right the women are in my situation when it comes to an American being married to an Egyptian.

Since yesterday we have been making lists of things to take, things to buy, things to do before leaving Cairo, things to do in the US, and things to bring back.

In the meantime we are making sure "all our ducks are in a row."

Insha’Allah it will all work out.

Ma’salaam,

~Marian

Fun Day and Photos

We had a "fun day" at school today for the elementary and middle schools. It was nice because I was able to take my camera to work and snap a few photos of students. I just had to get a photo of my dear friend Reham and me. I call her "Spicy" because her sense of humor and personality is quite sharp. She calls me "Mimi" because she wants to.

Also is a picture of Mira who won an award for best costume in her class. She was really excited.

One of the Kindergarten teachers gave me a carved pumpkin - a jack'o lantern from the Kindergarten party. It really made me homesick - so a friend of mine

lit the pumpkin for me so I could see it light up. It was lovely. Thank you my friend.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Sometimes You Just Gotta Laugh

I returned to work this past Sunday after a week's vacation. I was supposed to have my first official day off, as I am going to work four days a week, but thought I ought to go in because it was such a long holiday and I didn't want the work to hit me hard on Monday when I returned to work. So I worked on Sunday, was going to take off Monday, then Tuesday, well, and now the rest of the week. I guess I'll start my new schedule next Sunday.

It has been absolutely crazy since the school re-opened after Eid. I knew it would be but not to such a drastic extent. First of all, there is a colleague of mine that is on "strike" meaning she is not working to make a point of getting paid what she deserves. OK, I understand her reasons for doing this, but it directly affects me because I share an office with her. Also, it is affecting the teachers because they have to cover her classes. She was literally sitting at her desk and just doing absolutely nothing. It was awful to see her there doing nothing, and I'm sure she didn't enjoy it either.

End of term exams have been taking place at school this week for the middle school and high school grades. The students are crazy, which makes some of us staff crazy. You know what happens to me when I get crazy? I get angry first, then frustrated, and by the end of the day, I just had myself a really good laugh with a friend of mine. It was the best way to end a school day, especially after a couple of days that have been unbelievably hectic.

First we started laughing about a project we're working on together, then we just started laughing about anything and everything else. I eventually forgot that it was time to go and check out the teachers for the day, so when I returned to my office, the teachers had made a list of names of people who left. I didn't care though, because I had a good laugh with a friend.

Sometimes you just gotta laugh.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

How I Spent My Eid

Well it started simply enough: grilled fish at Aunt Olfat's. We spend a lot of time there because her health is deteriorating and although the chemo seems to be working, I know from personal experience the cancer can take a turn at any moment.

I'm not a big fan of grilled fish. I like fish, but when the whole fish is served on my plate (including the head), I lose my appetite. I have learned to just pull off the head and put it aside. Recently when we were at Aunt Fawzayya's eating fish (they love fish in Hassan's family and maybe that's why they live so long), Mira translated the following Arabic sentence to me: "Aunt Fawzayya just asked if anyone didn't want their heads." I stopped eating at that point. Mira has a way of picking and choosing what to translate.

Back to Eid. The second day we had Aunt Olfat and her entire family, including cousins over to our place. Guess what we had for dinner: yes, you're right, fish again. Only this time it was extra smoked fish. How was it? Not too bad - reminds me of the kippers I used to eat with my Dad on Saturdays. But too much smoked fish is just too much salt. I'm not a big fan of salt either. Somehow Aunt Olfat made it up the five flights of stairs to our apartment. Amazing what determination can do for someone.

Enough fish for me. It is the equivalent of my lamb Ramadan last year.

After eating, Hassan's cousin the high ranking police officer, brought out his bag of fireworks. I'm not talking just any bag. A really good sized bag of all kinds of fireworks. They started lighting them off the balcony (we're on the top floor), in the hallway outside our apartment, then decided to take it outside for some serious fireworks. It was too loud and definitely too much fire for me.

I don't understand the irony in fireworks. In Egypt people have a difficult time owning guns (actually I don't know anyone except police officers), and in the US anyone can own a gun, but not shoot off fireworks - they're illegal. Go figure.

I explained it to my Egyptian relatives this way: In the US they don't want you to lose a finger or leg or arm, just die by the bullet. I had to make a joke out of it because it actually doesn't make any sense. I'm not a gun advocate although Hassan owned one in the US, but I can see people hunting with them -- take my brother-in-law in Pennsylvania as a perfect example.

So after the police officer cousin finished his bag, in walks his older brother, the officer in the Army with his bag of fireworks. It was a never-ending spectacle of fireworks.

Yesterday we went to the Military Club in Nasr City to have dinner. I don't usually have a hard time getting into the club, just keep my mouth shut as I pass the police and don't look them in the eyes. Of course it's easier in hijab. My nearly deaf uncle took Mira and me in the club and he was ahead of me. When the policeman stopped me to ask me a question, my nearly deaf uncle somehow heard what was said and mumbled something in return. I walked right through.

Now it's the end of Eid and I'm sitting at home alone. Hassan took Mira out for the day and went to Shabaan's.

As I was on the internet, I found a great website for lyrics to songs - just about any song one can imagine. You can guess what I did next - yes, I sure did -- played rock and roll star.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Eid Mubarak

I wish everyone who reads this blog a happy Eid al Fitr - the Feast that follows the end of Ramadan.

This Eid or "holiday" is spent with family. Schools are closed for the week and businesses are closed for approximately two days to give families time to celebrate the end of Ramadan (except restaurants, of course).

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

As Ramadan comes to an end . . .

I am asking myself if I am a better person as a result of this past Ramadan. This Ramadan was definitely better than last year's Ramadan maybe because last year was my first year in Cairo, and I heard a lot of hype about Ramadan in Egypt, but found it was somewhat of a letdown. Maybe I feel better about this year's Ramadan because I actually tried to be a better person (although sometimes it was difficult to notice) making an extra effort in the different aspects of my life.

It is not recommended when people fast during Ramadan to walk around complaining about hunger or thirst. Actually fasting in Islam is very similar to fasting in Christianity where one is supposed to put on their best face, smile, and be more kind to those around you. I think this is an overlooked commonality between the two religions (among others to be quite honest). This Ramadan helped me realize that no one is perfect (especially me) but we all do our best to get through the days together, knowing that we are all striving to please God. Knowing that others were fasting encouraged me to keep going whenever I was ready to take a sip of water. It wasn't the hunger that bothered me, but rather the thirst for water.

For me, the goal of fasting during Ramadan made me rely on God even more, realizing and appreciating everything in life.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

The Johnstown, Pennsylvania USA Inclined Plane

Mira woke up this morning well-rested with a lot of fresh questions on her mind. One of her questions was regarding the Inclined Plane in Johnstown, PA USA. Who knows where she gets these questions from, but if I'm well-rested I'm ready for whatever she asks, and luckily this morning it was a topic that is near and dear to my heart.

The Inclined Plane sits on the side of a mountain, what Western Pennsylvanians call "hills" and slowly moves up and down, carrying people along with one or two cars at a time. It was originally built to move passengers and carriages up Yoder Hill in Johnstown.

Statistics for the Inclined Plane:
Elevation: 1693.5 ft.
Length: 896.5 ft.
Lift: 502.2 ft.
Grade: 70.9%

The thought of the inclined plane still makes me queasy. One doesn't realize how steep the grade is until 1) you're riding on it, or 2) you're married to an engineer who is fascinated by the structure that was built many years ago.

Even though I'm living in Egypt -- pass by the Pyramids on a regular basis, have been to the Cairo Museum, have lived near Washington, DC and visited the monuments and Smithsonian museums on many occasions, and went boating in the Tidal Basin (ok so it was a paddle boat) at the peak of Cherry Blossom season, the Johnstown Inclined Plane is still one of my favorite all-time sightseeing attractions.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Happy Birthday, Dad!

Today is my Dad's birthday. I don't know if I will be successful in calling him so I want to write a special birthday greeting to my Dad.

Dear Dad,

Thanks for all you've done throughout your life. I think of you daily and want you to know how much I appreciate all you did for us kids, and Mom.

You worked tirelessly for many years providing a home and warm environment which enriched us all and make us who we are today.

Mira asks about you often and I tell her how you used to sing to me songs from many years ago, you know, "When you wore a tulip . . ." "Toot toot tootsie goodbye . . ." the list is endless, isn't it?

Mira asks questions about "PapPap" and what he was like when I was growing up. I say that you and I used to go out Friday nights shopping, how I was the youngest child for four years until my younger sister was born, and how you used to take my brothers and I out for hot dogs and Pepsi on Saturday mornings, in addition to many other memories.

We may not be together right now, but I hold all the great memories that we made as a family dearly in my heart. I remember the holidays: Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, summer holidays and vacations -- making the best of it and having a great time with a wife and five children. We were our own sports team if you look at it a certain way.

I tell Mira about your parents and how wonderful they were -- how they loved us very much and how they wanted the best for us -- always there for us; especially Granpap. She asks about how often we would visit Granpap, and I tell her that he would come and stay with us and help Baba with the house and the kids. He would cut the grass in the yard, and then when you would get home from work, he would yell at you "What the hell did you plant that tree there for, Joe?" I'm sure you remember; it is with such fondness and love. Funny how things at the time are not endearing, it's only as time passes that we long to return to the days of when we were growing up.

Thank you for making me the responsible person that I am today. I don't know how you and Mom did it, but you stood by me no matter what. Your unconditional love and support helped me survive my 20's, enjoy marriage in my 30's, and parenting in my 40's.

STOLAT!

Love Always,

Marian

Ramadan and the Night of Power

The following is an excerpt from an article found on www.Islamicity.com.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian


Ramadan and the Night of Power

We have indeed revealed this (Message) in the Night of Power: And what will explain to you what the night of power is? The Night of Power is better than a thousand months. Therein come down the angels and the Spirit by Allah's permission, on every errand: Peace!...This until the rise of morn! (97:1-5)The Night of Power in His infinite wisdom is encouraged to be searched during the odd nights of the last ten days of Ramadan. Since over fourteen centuries Muslims are striving diligently to benefit greatly from it. A rare trade indeed - pure profit and thousand times more!

Interestingly we have embraced the night for its mathematical magic but seemingly misplaced the very essence of the night. In fact, it was just another dark night. But it became the Night of Power because of what was revealed in the darkness. It is now known to us, a night better than a thousand months. The dark night is illuminating the world and the Quran is guiding the humanity ever since.

The Night of Power is celebrated powerfully. Masajid and communities celebrate the night by staying up all night, listening to lectures, reading Quran, etc. What seems to be missing though is to reflect on the Divine Words and to act upon it. Unless that is done, the real power will not be received from the Night of Power.

Ramadan visits us every year and offers us a reason to reflect on all aspect of our lives. The objects of our wants and fears far surpass the limits of human genius, energy, and mortal life. The sum of all that we need and desire .. spiritual or material, essential or superfluous .. simply exceeds our ability to attain it. What, then, is one to do? The believer turns to his or her Creator in prayer. The response is natural. Whether moved by need or hope, or faced with misfortune or danger, people instinctively call upon God. Prayer is at the center of our very being and the marrow of the Muslim way of life. For many in the English speaking world, however, this face of Islam is virtually unknown.

Dua - Supplication - Prayer is Muslim's hope for everything at all times. Let us submit ourselves and plead and plead and plead ... as He alone can relieve us of our anxieties and sufferings.

Insha'Allah it will all work out

Well, after thinking of leaving school and staying and leaving once again, I think it's all going to work out, Insha'Allah.

I spoke with the principal of the school and we agreed that we would try having me work 4 days a week instead of 5. I was asked if I would be interested in working 3 days a week. Honestly, I'm not a 3 day a week person. Either full-time or not at all. So I consider 4 days a week to be full-time, giving me an extra day off. My day off will be Sunday -- I left which day off up to the principal. She said that work builds up in the school day by day during the week that by Thursday it's really busy. I agreed.

I'm satisifed with this decision.

Regarding my week of pay from June -- it's not the money it's the principle of the matter, apparently my week of pay has been approved so many times I've gotten dizzy. Finally at the end of today I was told that the actual pay slip is on the desk of the owner to sign so I can get my money. Otherwise, I was going to request a week of in lieu of the week's pay. I could always use the extra time off.

The principal is looking to hire a secretary for the office to assist me in the daily responsibilities, but somehow, after interviewing 3 women, showing them around the school, and asking them if they're interested, they all answer "you have a lot of work to do. Your job is very demanding." No kidding. They all leave without ever contacting the principal again. Oh well, we will keep searching.

In Egypt schools usually pay in cash. However, this month the school decided to go with an ATM card to pay its employees. Payday was on the 15th, and hopefully the cards are working now. They haven't been working for two days already. Doesn't the school know that people have to take care of their families?

Since it is the last week of Ramadan and next week is Eid, the school will be closed next week giving the staff a well-deserved break. I hope that everything is straightened out before we begin our Eid vacation.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

I couldn't sleep at all last night

I was up early today - 3:30 a.m. to be exact for suhoor (last meal before fasting). This gave me a lot of time to think about what I will do with a lot of time on my hands. I mean realistically how long will I be happy at home without any social interaction - a week, two weeks tops? I was off for winter break in January and I went nuts after two weeks - we had almost a full four week vacation - imagine that!!

Maybe I've been looking at this whole issue more negatively than I should have. I stopped thinking about all the positive aspects of work, and just focused on the few negative aspects. Why is it that negativity tends to overpower the positivity in our brains? A question to be answered another day.

I am a positive person. Just ask Hassan. I drive him nuts with my positive attitude.

In any event, I will just see how everything plays out today -- it maybe my last day and it may not be my last day. I don't even know.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Ramadan and the Quran

I found the following article in an email.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

The Holy Quran

Definition

The sacred scripture of Islam and the true word of God as revealed to the Prophet Muhammad (Peace and Blessings be Upon Him - PBUH.)

Revelation of Holy Quran

The Holy Quran was first set on a preserved tablet, as Allah Almighty says in the Holy Book: "It is a Glorious Quran, on a well-preserved tablet" (Quran 85:22). Then it was revealed to the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) by the angel Gabriel (PBUH) part by part through a period of 23 years. Each revelation of the Holy Quran was written down by the Prophet's scribes under his instruction and supervision. The current order and organization of the entire revelation of Holy Quran, divided into 114 chapters (surahs), was made by the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) himself. Besides, the entire Quran was committed to memory by the Prophet and his companions (sahabah). The practice of memorizing the whole Quran continued throughout centuries till date. Nowadays, there are thousands of Muslims who know the whole Quran by heart. They are called "Huffaz."
The reasons for revealing the Quran piecemeal

To stabilize the heart of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH).
To ease the process of the revelation of the Quran to Prophet Muhammad (PBUH).
To graduate the process of legitimising the divine rules.
To ease the process of memorising and understanding the Quran.
Some parts of the Quran were revealed after some events.
To make easy the process of getting rid of past bad habits for those newly converted to Islam.

Number of Quranic Chapters and Verses

Quran Chapters

Holy Quran is divided into thirty equal chapters, which are called (juz') in Arabic.

There are 114 Surahs of varying length. The longest Surah is Al-Baqarah consisting of 286 verses and the shortest Surah is Al Kawthar consisting of only three verses. The whole Quran has 6236 verses containing 77,250 words.

The first five verses of Surat Al-Alaq , were the first verses ever revealed in the Quran. It reads: "Iqra bismi rabbikalla dhi khalaq. Khalaqal insana min alaq. Iqra wa rabtukal alrram. Alladhi 'allama bil qalam. 'Allamal insana malam ya?lam " which means, "Read in the name of your Lord who created, created man from a clot. Read, for your Lord is most Generous, Who teaches by means of the pen, teaches man what he does not know." (96: 1-5)

The last verse revealed was number (281) from Surat Al-Baqara which means " Guard yourselves against a day in which you will be brought back to Allah. Then every soul will be paid in full that which it has earned, and they will not be wronged" (2:281).

Iftar with Hassan's friends

Here are some photos from an iftar (breaking of the fast) that we went to with Hassan's friends and their families at the Cairo University Rowing Club last weekend. It has turned into an annual event -- this is the second year we've met for iftar so I consider it to be "annual."

Notice there aren't any pictures of me. I don't like having my picture taken. It took a lot of courage for me to post my photo in my blog profile -- I hope to change it to something much better at some point, but again, there are few pictures of me -- I'm too shy. Ana maksufa.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Should I stay or should I go now???

Now since I wrote that I will be staying home some interesting events have taken place.

I have been thinking about how I will really miss the people I work with. The greatest asset to any school is its staff. This school is no different, especially as a foreigner living in Egypt.

I talked to the principal of the school today several different times about how I could stay -- weighing the pros and cons of staying at work and staying at home. I think that there are many more pros than cons overall, but since the principal suggested I write them down over the weekend, I told her I would do this and get back to her with my list on Sunday (the day we return to school - by the way I'm still in the Monday-Friday mode, so I need a calendar everyday to remind me what day it really is).

Also, she informed me that there is a group of teachers who want to petition the owner of the school to keep me; not let me leave. I was given warning about this from a co-worker, but didn't realize that it reached the principal's office. I am very touched that I am so well liked.

I'm not ruling out the possibility of leaving, but at the same time trying to think of ways I can stay at work and still be happy.

I'm worried that if I stay home all the time I will get bored too quickly and miss my friends at work. It's not that I'm very close with people at work, but just the social aspect of the place really makes my day. We all need contact with each other, and I am no exception. I have found that Egyptians are the friendlist people in the world. Of course they are, would I think anything different?

I know I am no different than any other woman who wants it all. But there needs to be a balance between my work life and my personal life.

Egyptians are very social. They will sit and talk for hours about everything and anything. They love to laugh and they love to help other people. With my inability to speak Arabic, I am now trying to speak as much Arabic as I know, which isn't much, and the Egyptians who cannot speak English try to speak as much English as they know.

We meet in the middle which is a good place to be.

Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Life is changing yet again . . .

As you can see, I have changed my photo. Gone is the photo without hijab. I have been wearing hijab since July 3 2006. Why do I remember this? Because we were going to the North Coast and I told Hassan I was just going to try it to see if I felt comfortable wearing it.

Knowing Hassan didn't want me to wear hijab, even though we talked about it for a long time, practically since we moved here, I tried to wear it anyway. Once I put it on, that was it. I haven't thought once about taking it off. Hassan has even started complimenting me once again on how nice I look - SobhanAllah!

The second big change is that I am leaving my job at Mira's school. My feelings are mixed but I am at peace about it. My last day will be on Sunday, October 15, when I hope to receive my final pay, Insha'Allah. I will dearly miss my co-workers, and hope to keep in touch by visiting every so often, as Mira will still be going to the school. I will continue to take Mira to school, but it won't be as early as 7 a.m. She won't need to be there until 7:45.

Ah yes, the third big change. I will be staying at home enjoying my new sewing machine. I bought a Pfaff sewing machine about a month ago and it runs like a dream. Once again, thanks to Shabaan who took Hassan and me to Attaba to find the perfect sewing machine.

Next I will be venturing to the fabric district here in Cairo to begin my quilting fabric stash Egyptian-style. OK, Omar the Tent Maker get ready, Marian's on her way!

On another note, we had a wicked sand storm today. Usually I don't mind them, but because it was about 93 degrees F and the wind was gusting, it sounded as though snow was hitting the window at school. When I looked outside I was disappointed to see that it was the desert sand in hot weather. Oh well, January isn't far away. That's when the geraniums bloom. Go figure.

Ramadan Kareem and Ma'salaam,

~Marian

Pope Benedict XVI's Comments

I don't know if Chrisitans are aware of this, but Muslims listen to what the Pope has to say. He is a world moral leader, speaking for Christians, as Muslims make no distinction between Catholic or Protestant.

Pope Benedict's recent comments on Islam is causing quite a stir.

I encourage you to learn more about Islam and what it says about violence.

If you want to learn more, please read. If not, why not?

Ma'salaam,

Marian

The following is from the www.cair-net.org website where you can subscribe to daily news releases concerning Islam and America.

In the Name of God, the Compassionate, the Merciful

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

U.S. MUSLIMS CALL FOR DIALOGUE OVER POPE'S COMMENTS ON ISLAM CAIR seeks meeting with Vatican representative in Washington, D.C.
(WASHINGTON, D.C., 9/15/2006) -

The Council on American-Islamic Relations (CAIR) today called for increased dialogue between Muslims and Catholics over the controversy sparked by remarks perceived as insulting to Islam and the Prophet Muhammad made by Pope Benedict XVI. CAIR is also seeking a meeting with the Vatican's representative in Washington, D.C., to discuss the remarks.

In an address on Tuesday, the Pope quoted a 14th century Byzantine Christian Emperor as saying: "Show me just what Muhammad brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached."

SEE: Muslim Leaders Blast Pope's Comments (Washington Post)

In a statement issued today, the Washington-based Islamic civil rights and advocacy group said:"The proper response to the Pope's inaccurate and divisive remarks is for Muslims and Catholics worldwide to increase dialogue and outreach efforts aimed at building better relations between Christianity and Islam. This unfortunate episode also offers an opportunity for Christians to learn more about Islam, the Prophet Muhammad and the Islamic concept of jihad."Jihad is a central and broad Islamic concept that includes struggle against evil inclinations within oneself, struggle to improve the quality of life in society, struggle in the battlefield for self-defense (e.g., - having a standing army for national defense), or fighting against tyranny or oppression. 'Jihad' should not be translated as 'holy war.'"

The Quran, Islam's revealed text, condemns forced acceptance of any faith when it states: 'Let there be no compulsion in religion.' (2:256)

Islam calls for peace once oppression ends: 'Fight in the cause of God with those who fight against you, but do not exceed the limits...If they desist, let there be no hostility except against the oppressors." (2:190-193)

"Muslims are also asked to maintain good relations with people of other faiths, and to engage in constructive dialogue. 'And dispute not with the People of the Book (Christians and Jews) except with means better (than mere disputation). . .but say, 'We believe in the Revelation that has come down to us and in that which came down to you.'" (29:46)

"The Quran also states: '(Rest assured that) those who believe (in the Quran), and those who follow the Jewish (scriptures), and the Christians, and the Sabians - whoever believes in God and the last day and performs good deeds - will be rewarded by their Lord. They will have nothing to fear or to regret.' (2:62)

"In Islam, there is no contradiction between faith and reason. The first verses revealed to the Prophet Muhammad included: 'Read! In the name of your Lord. . .Read! Your Lord is the Most Gracious, Who taught by the (use of the) pen, taught man what he knew not.'

Historically, whenever Islam flourished, so did knowledge and discovery."Let us all continue the interfaith efforts promoted by the late Pope John Paul II, who made great strides in bringing Muslims and Catholics together for the common good."

Along with a request for a meeting with a Vatican representative in the United States, CAIR is urging Americans of all faiths to learn more about Islam and about the life and legacy of the Prophet Muhammad by requesting a free Quran or a book or DVD about Muhammad at www.explorethequran.org and www.cair.com/Muhammad. CAIR has 32 offices and chapters nationwide and in Canada. Its mission is to enhance the understanding of Islam, encourage dialogue, protect civil liberties, empower American Muslims, and build coalitions that promote justice and mutual understanding.

- END -

CONTACT: CAIR National Communications Director Ibrahim Hooper, 202-488-8787 or 202-744-7726, E-Mail: ihooper@cair-net.org-----CAIRCouncil on American-Islamic Relations453 New Jersey Avenue, S.E.Washington, D.C. 20003

Tel: 202-488-8787, 202-744-7726Fax: 202-488-0833
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